Honestly

I honestly wish that everything could be over so that I don't have to have such ominous feelings come past me. I feel as though I am in the water and can't see shore. I wish that this could not be the only life that exists, the life that we live here on Earth. I feel the worst is going to happen to me. Is there a way that I can escape everything? No matter how much happiness and great feelings come with life, concern and terror will always outweigh the great feeling, and that's why I fantasize about leaving Earth. I'm not talking about death. Instead, this is about escaping all experience of life all just to get away from ominous feeling. I can't afford to have any ominous feeling in my mind, because that means that something is seriously wrong, so wrong that it's irreversible.